I ran with Michelle Kakade - So I thought - Musings from a huff n puff run

03:30 hrs - The alarm goes off. I toss and turn, I haven't had a very good night's sleep considering I slept at midnight. So let me sleep.

03:45 hrs - The alarm goes off again. Oh well, I don't need to do this. It's not my race, so take it easy.

04:00 hrs - The alarm goes off yet again. I look at the time and suddenly spring up, got to pick up a few friends and rush.

04:00-04:45 hrs - It's all over in 5 minutes. Imagine 45 minutes went by in 5 minutes. I grab my keys and rush down, drive, pick up and we are on our way.

The Occasion : Michelle Kakade - India's Endurance Queen in Long Distance running is finishing her Great Indian Quadrilateral Run - 6000 kms (appx) across India in 6 months. And as members of the running fraternity we want to be a part of the final lap. Well so we thought, more on that later.

The starting point was the Siddhivinayak Temple, Prabhadevi, surely the best place and time to start, just as dawn broke. The aura within the vicinity is such that it invigorates so much into the soul that one feels ready to take on anything (in my own menial circumstances run from there to the Gateway... sigh... what a run err... walk... we will see)

A hush draws up amongst the modest crowd that has gathered for the final lap. I crane my neck to see surely, that must be the arrival of Michelle (I had befriended her on Facebook when she started the run but was yet to meet her, although we followed her journey with great enthusiasm). Alas it was Mrs Nita Ambani and her son in the new avtar. As the self conscious security hushed anyone who had any thoughts of a selfie and the unperturbed Ambanis walked away... sorry drive away, we settled down again for the powers who be, to sound the bugle for the start. Our patience survived and soon Michelle arrived, a short formality done, she immediately got down to what she does best... Run... Oh well there I stood still wondering... the run had started... Our mentors Kaushik and Bindu Panchal looked at us as they started to run, I stood there waiting for the familiar sound of Kaushik's whistle and suddenly it dawned... run

So there we were a group of about 50 or what 70 who tried to follow Michelle on her last lap. But she was like the wind, running ahead, surely she must know there will be slow, amateur runners like us, but there she goes. Oh well never mind, she has a record to set and me I just have to run.

Soon the traffic begins to thin, the road looms large, I begin to hear my breathe. I look at the GPS on my watch, what? I have just done 2k and nobody I know is there except Bindu who has reduced her pace to accompany me. I panic - has my pace always been this slow? Then I hear a familiar voice in my mind easy... easy... I'm here to enjoy the run, this is not a race, this me talking to myself, this is my time.

The mind calms down a bit and I ask myself the same question - why am I running, why do people run long distance. Is it for health, is it for fun or is it for competition? Too complicated, it surely must be something simple. A gust of wind blows away the rose petals that are strewn every couple of kilometres, reminding us that Michelle had passed a good 20 minutes earlier. Chalo, at least we are on the right track.

The sea smells great as we cross the Nehru Centre and head into the Haji Ali stretch, we converse about the SCMM route, the humid weather - funny we are only reminded about the humidity when we are running ourselves and as soon as the mind says slow down or stop, we look at each other and say - Yaar the weather is so humid, I'm not able to run. Probably yes if not for the weather we would be like Milkha Singh, or rather Michelle and do this with the snap of our fingers. Oh well, the vagaries of trying to behave like a runner.

In the meantime... Shit... No way... the Peddar Road incline... Time to conjure up more terminology that one has learnt recently. Is this hill run? What my mentors look at me strangely and say shut up and run. Well I was just trying to strike a conversation. A few furlongs and I give up running and start walking. An inadvertent look at the GPS tells me we just did 10k, what we managed 10k? I'm shocked and suddenly in awe of myself until the runners passing us mention that Michelle would have reached by now... there so much for doing the final lap

We turn towards Babulnath, the feet are now starting to slow, the will is starting to wilt, we grab a few bottles of water offered. Replenish our carry ons. The glorious sun turns the route a resplendent gold. The slow pace, a slight breeze as we cross over for the necklace, the body is now in auto mode. A heady feeling starts to creep in, I panic a bit, have I lost too much water, am I doing this right, I look around... everything is in slow motion, the only sound I hear is of the wind and my breath. The slow thump of the feet on the ground barely audible. For a few brief moments I experience the bliss of being a runner - alone, content with myself, no competition, no timing, no hurry, its just me running infinitely. And the suddenly a jerk, I am back to the real world, the pain in the feet s creeping in, shit - there is soreness, Oh God, I forgot to vaseline, suddenly I hear a shout - Ambani

Ouch, now where did that come from. We are greeted by the sight of now the younger Ambani sibling working out in full glory just past the gymkhana. The guards again more selfie conscious than the camera holders. Well I have had enough of celebrities for the day, we move on - slowly Marine drive done. Fifteen minutes later in what seems like eternity the last mile beckons past the Rajabai Tower - a walk, a crawl and a few strutted steps later, we cross Regal, suddenly the Gateway looms ahead. Kaushik looks at me and beckons come on, open your stride at least now, run... And we run, he and Bindu like the athletes they are and me as if a dog is behind me. We reach the finish point as I rush to stop me GPS. 1:59:57 secs. Did I just run that - BLANK

A few minutes later we are here for what we came for to laud Michelle complete her record feat. I photo bomb a picture being taken with her. Chalo so what if didn't get to meet her, I got a pic and thanks to Kaushik and Bindu managed to huff and puff my way.

Thank you Michelle, it was memorable run - Your 6000k and our tiny 15k.

Thank you Kaushik and Bindu - 3 Cheers to you and to several more runs (hopefully I last that long)

Oh before I forget - the trainer in Kaushik doesn't stop - he makes us walk all the way back to Churchgate  

Of Love, Compassion, Empathy and Service

Time and tide wait for none - The last 72 hours bear testimony to it. A roller coaster ride of emotions has over taken the otherwise sane world that one assumes in daily life. On Sunday the 3rd of April, 2016 the hand that had cradled us, led us onto the path of Satguru Ji - our dear Grand Father Kirpal Singh Ji passed away after a sudden bout of illness.

Though 90+ (the age - a guess he was happy with) he was always full of zest and life. A compulsive daily diary writer for the past couple of decades and a person who loved to narrate real stories full of his life time experiences, whenever one visited him. Son of the first Namdhari settler in Hyderabad - Sant Teja Singh originally from Gujranwala, British India, on one hand he would often reminisce about the Nizam State - Hyderabad and on the other hand how the family settled and expanded into the current Namdhari Sangat of Hyderabad under the benevolence of Satguru Partap Singh Ji, Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji and now continues to flourish under Satguru Uday Singh Ji. Five generations of Namdharis have since settled in Hyderabad but we never got bored of their stories whenever Pita Ji (lovingly called by all of us) narrated them. The stories we hope to continue narrating to our children carrying forth his legacy.

While the stories about Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji's visits to Hyderabad were narrated with new insights every time he could remember, one thing stood common in all of them - Mata Chand Kaur Ji, the revered wife of Satguru Ji who always accompanied Him every where he toured. While the bond with Satguru Ji was always that of a Guru and a Sikh and transcended all relations, Mata ji's affection and love drew everybody closer to the family. Her constant efforts to serve and look after the community as her own, wherever she went - set an example for everyone. In 2012 when Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji passed away, Mata Ji, Satguru Ji's constant companion enveloped the community in a soothing balm and facilitated a remarkably smooth transition onto Satguru Uday Singh Ji, under trying circumstances. So it came as a shocker when within 16 hours of Pita Ji passing away we were confronted with the news that Mata Ji had passed away in a brutal, violent act of hideousness, leaving the community bereaved on Monday 4th of April, 2016 - A double heart break!

It was only a week before during the Holla Mohalla in March that we had had a beautiful audience with her in Sri Bhaini Sahib (the spiritual head quarters of the Namdharis near Ludhiana). It was late afternoon and as we came out of the Langar Hall (Community dining hall),  there she was, the face ever smiling, blessing the seekers and looking after the Langar arrangements as she always did. As we passed her for a strange reason unlike ever before an impulse drew me to her. And as I bent down in reverence, she placed her hands on my shoulders and asked me how was the little one. A healer always, she has healed many with her austere energy. A brief conversation later, I walked away feeling blessed. It is only now that I realise the importance of that moment. A moment that is now etched in the memory forever. 

A silence has enveloped the mind ever since. While religion, politics, tolerance or rather intolerance are big words to speak and describe the environment, it is only words like love, compassion, empathy and service that brings us all together in this moment of grief. It is love that will help us keep the bonding together, compassion that will help us over come the grief, empathy that will make us and Satguru Ji stronger and service above self - the main stay of Mata Ji's life - it is that service that will keep her alive and living within the community as well as ourselves. Lets resolve to strengthen the bond that has always existed and keep the name and prestige of our Satguru Jis always high. With a prayer on the lips and a heart that continues to search for the love, compassion, empathy and service that Mata Ji spread. - Dhan Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji, Dhan Satguru Uday Singh Ji

Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji - Transcending Relations

Another year has gone by in the rigmarole of life. Wishes were sent and received. Resolutions made and broken. In the midst of all of this we were called upon to visit a few visiting relatives. We arrived an hour late… As usual… Wait it wasn’t just us but the city traffic as well. Pleasantries exchanged and as we sat across each other,the conversation settled into asking the well being of the families and as theevening bore on several cousins and distant relatives whom we hadn’t even heardof tumbled out of the several memory lanes present. And then it struck.

We seldom know relatives beyond our immediate family and maybe an odd cousin or so within our own generation. And as one generation passes on the mantle to the incoming generation several more of those cousins and relatives are lost in the sands of the passing time.That set the mind thinking is there any relation that transcends time and generations? And as if an inner voice answered immediately… Yes… The soul and the spirit and in our case our beloved Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji and the several Satgurus before Him.

Come to think of it Satguru Jiwas and is the common link in at least five generations of every family of ours… From the great grandfather to the great grand sons and daughters oftoday, He was and is the thread that wove the families together to form the collectivity of the family. The Father of our family tree. The soul of our family.

To have been touched by, loved by and nurtured by Him gives a very different perspective to our lives and dawnsupon us the responsibility that we carry. The responsibility to carry His ideals forward, the responsibility to live His way of life, the responsibility to unite Him with the incoming generation, so that we can be bound by the common thread and be a part of a timeless relation that transcends all relations.

A relation bound by the soul and love of our Father, our Friend, our Soul and our Lord – His Holiness Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji. May our efforts make Him proud and may we with His benevolence- live Him everyday of our life, spread His essence through the sands of time,transcending all boundaries for generations to come.

Dhan Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji  

Moments - Here and Now with HH Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji

A year has gone past like a whiff of flowers in the wind and as one looks back, a thought comes to the mind - how did it go by so fast? Wasn't it just yesterday that the unthinkable happened and we were left wondering what would become of us? But then time has it's own way of reminding us - It has been more than 3 billion seconds since that fateful evening on the 13 of December 2012, precisely at 6:28pm... Yes 6:28pm... The clock now etched in the memories of millions, not forgotten so easily.

Look at it closely.... 3 billion odd seconds... Ever wondered about them, what did they stand for? Was it just time going by? From a time keepers point of view... Yes! But from another perspective they were not just seconds but moments.... Yes moments... And dare we say they were more than 3 billion moments, for each of those moments captured billions of moments that one had spent with the beloved father - HH Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji. Moments that were unique to each of us in their own ways, yet had the common thread of the Lord's weaving in it. Each moment that stood still in time, savoured and felt deep within the ravines of the heart. Each moment brought a tear to eye and wish on the lip - if only for a moment....

Words were spoken, gratitude expressed and tributes flowed... A soul celebrated... A year that went by... But something is still amiss... The emptiness inside echoes... Unnerving one... Almost to the point of desperation, as the mind seeks the answer tot he question 'did we miss something? And then a faint voice fades in... Like the soft notes of the taanpura, it fades in slowly at first... As if slowly spreading the fresh smell of the incense and as the voice breaks in and gains in volume... You hear it.... I have been here all the time, through the billions of moments that have gone by, looking after you... Yes looking after you... Through your trial and tribulations, through your tears and fears, through the questions and answers that you have posed and given, through your minds and your hearts... Each and every moment. And then the voice asks - But where have you been? Have you felt each and every moment, heard Me speak in each of them?

And suddenly it dawns, each moment was an opportunity... An opportunity to express our love and gratitude to our eternal father who led by example through the year and thought of us every moment, every second, while we debated and thought and wished and hoped and prayed... He looked after us, felt every moment of ours without judging us, letting us breathe and survive, not missing even a moment. He was there in the tear, the smile, the wish, the abyss and beyond doing what He always did without any expectation, prompting us to look back and reflect how many of those moments did we live? And we realize not even a percent of what He did.

A pall of gloom falls upon, did we then fail Him? And the humble notes of the music answer back... No this is not to remind you of the moments gone by, but to present you with more moments, more opportunities that are coming your way... And He says 'I will be there'. The question is will WE be there... An opportunity... An responsibility... To live every moment, feel every moment of His presence and yes to add and cherish billions of moments with our Lord, Master, Satguru, Friend and Guide... His Holiness Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji

Happy Diwali - Sri Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji - A Memoir

It is that time of the year that one starts exchanging season’s greetings, wishing everyone, getting blessed by the elders of the family and blessing the younger one’s. Like every year this year seemed like the earlier, but as the day wore on and one went about greeting everyone, an odd feeling set in, something was amiss, but one couldn’t place it… 12 hours later and towards the fag end of the day, now, past midnight, just as one is about to plan ‘a to do’ list or turn in, one realizes what is amiss. When one has been celebrating a festival or a season since childhood, the daily chores of the festival are a matter of habit and one goes about it mechanically.

For years it has been habitual for one to start the ‘Diwali’ season by either going to Sri Bhaini Sahib and doing Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji’s darshan or if one is not able to make it, atleast call and seek His Holiness’s blessings and wish Him a very Happy Diwali.

It is written that ‘Diwali’ is celebrated when the victorious Lord Rama reached Ayodhya after 14 years. The streets and houses were lit with rows and lamps and everyone was overjoyed. Onecould only imagine the poet’s words, but in Sri Bhaini Sahib one could witnessit in Satguru Ji’s presence.

The evenings there were spent witnessing the brilliance of the hundred of lamps lit in His Holiness’s presence. The sounds of the hymns punctuating the cool wind that begins to blowin November. The glowing face of Satguru Ji lighting up the world of each andeveryone. What a sight… How lucky were we to have witnessed heaven on earth, usmere mortals, who had done nothing but sin. It was only His benevolence thatgave one that chance.

Always involved, always alert and always willing to be an active participant in each and everyone’s life… even the little joys. His benevolence resounded in the musical composition He composed extempore on witnessing a tray full of glowing lamps brought forth as obeisance at His feet on the occasion of ‘Diwali’ by a humble woman, answering her prayers and showering His blessings upon everyone present.

Looking back at all those years and the memories associated with them brings one back to the wish… If only one could relive that moment again, have that one glimpse, feel the presence… His ever smiling face, the look in His eyes that drew one and all to Him and prompted each one of us to call Him or meet Him and wish Him a very Happy Diwali.

It is almost a year since His physical self passed away, the silence has been deafening, the lamps have remained unlit, destiny has taken its own course, some cross roads have been crossed while the territory is still unchartered, waiting for the traveler to continue one’s journey. The mind seeks His presence, the heart skips a beat at the slightest of the sound, and the head turns and looks back is He still there?And His benevolence answers ‘Don’t turn back, look at Me in front of you, the eternal light… I am the twinkle in your eye, the prayer on your lips, the beatin your heart, the love of your life and the path of your destiny. Fear not for I am there forever as long as your soul lives. I rejoice in your joy and am a partaker in your journey. I am the light in the lamp and the glow thatsurrounds it. Spread forth its warmth and look at me… Will you not wish metoday?” And I bow to thee, with tears in my eyes and a gentle nod… Look uptoHim and whisper ‘Happy Diwali to You My Lord, Sri Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji… may we be the earth on which lie the rows of lamps illuminated by your benign presence. May we be worthy of your benign self. May every word, effort of us,bring praise to Your thy self and make You proud of us. May we be so lucky to be blessed with your love, affection and presence forever ’ Dhan Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji

Six months on... His Holiness Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji

Six months is an awful lot of time in a lifetime. Sometimes they pass by so quickly that you hardly notice and sometimes you wish they would pass faster. But rarely does a moment come when you wish time would stand still and the six months shouldn't have passed. It has been six months since His Holiness Sri Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji united with the eternal light.

Although life has changed since, His omnipotent presence continues to pervade the heart and soul. The thought of His radiant smile continues to light up the dawn of the day , enchanting the very source of life. Seasons may have changed, from winters to summer and now the Rains, but the air still carries His fragrance, fresh as ever, like a dew on a flower.

Through the travail and travel of the past six months Every walk has been a walk to remember. He is the source and focus of each and every conversation, every spoken word a memory in itself. Each memory laying its claim as the purest and the closest. To have loved and be loved thus is truly divine and it is this love that continues to guide the spirit and lives in the soul of each and every one of us. 

To have read or heard of the Peahen's knock on His door would have just been a poet's imagination, but to have seen it, is to have felt the depth of Your love.

So much remains unfulfilled, the mind wanders, the soul searches and the heart pines, for where are you my Lord - Will we ever meet?

As we bow our head in reverence and in solemn memory, may we be born again and again where we can always meet.

Dhan Satguru Jagjit Singh J

God fearing or God loving ? Notes from here and there with His Holiness Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji

Religion and Spirituality are two facets of the same coin as much as Love and Fear are of the same coin. And all of them are intertwined and are the bases that contribute towards the formation of a person’s faith. Faith in itself is defined by one's belief in the occurrence and acceptance of miracle(s) and its creator and leads to the reinforcement of either love or fear depending on which hand the Creator deals out on that particular day.

Like everyone else we have been brought up on the path of our religion and faith and have been nurtured and tutored who and what to follow from childhood. But as we grow up and the environment around us changes, the marquees of faith and religion keep changing. And it becomes increasingly difficult to maintain both. At such junctures a sense of fear is then instilled in the faithful, that if you don’t do this, this will happen and if you do that, then that will happen. Slowly and surely as one grows up he becomes a God fearing person and hence in the eyes of the world a good person.

But is this what Religion and Spirituality is about? We do something because we fear that something might happen that we may not like? A well meaning but never the less a debatable question that cropped up in a discussion.

In a mind that has been pre-occupied and images keep floating in and out with memories of His Holiness Sri Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji, one dwells and wonders at the above take on Religion, Spirituality, Love, Fear etc., Would our relationship and faith fall into the same gambit or is it something else.

The answer to it perhaps lies in the personal and spiritual relationship that His Holiness Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji shared with each and every one of us. Yes each and everyone of us... come to think of it... if one was to go back and think, He has known each and everyone of us by name, mind you no small achievement considering we all must number more than a million. Add it the fact that this was over 92 years of His physical presence, across at least 7-8 generations of each family. Wow... how many of us even remember the names of our friends from schools or far that matter family members and cousins with whom we have spent our childhood.

As mere ordinary humans, mired in the hum drum of our daily lives, like others we all have the same fear and would have accounted and added to the God fearing population if not for His Holiness. His enduring love, the jest and energy that He poured in knowing each and every facet of one's life and His guiding force behind each and every decision, that made one forget their fears and do everything for the love of doing it and do it to get His benevolence and love. Whether it be adhering to the tenets of religion as taught by Him or something as simple as wearing a simple dress. His benevolence and large heartedness was such that each and every effort reinforced a relationship steeped in love and not fear.

The physical self may not be there but His unending love, continues to stir emotions, encourages everyone to be steadfast and build more relationships of love and not fear. Instill in each and everyone His virtue that enables us to be not God fearing people but God loving people.  For it is only when we do that, we tread the path the He has shown us, of humility and love, where the possibilities are limitless and happiness knows no bounds, a path that leads us to Him, without fear.

He is our guiding force; our spirit and our heart beat... His Holiness Satguru Jagjit Singh Ji